I need to be kept away from things that are messy.

Yesterday one of my co-workers sprayed me with spray paint. I still have it on me. Then, today, I was trying to get a pen to work so I tried sucking the ink out of it and ended up with a mouth full of ink, a blue tongue and purply-blue teeth... not to mention that Papermate pen ink tastes horrible and won't wash out!

I think I might be able to get out of cleaning the bathrooms tomorrow at work if I use this as an excuse :)